Saturday, July 31, 2010


I don't ovulate. Isn't that wonderful! [insert sarcasm]. ARG!

I had my first internal ultrasound yesterday. I learned I have a cyst "beside" my cervix. Whatever that means? I have two ovaries that like to hide. I thought she was going to stick the probe out of my side trying to find one of them. One of those pesky little guys is sitting on top of my uterus? WTH?

And the best part...I was on CD13 (according to them, CD 14 according to me), have BEAUTIFUL mucus and NO FOLLICLES?!?!?! Not a one. Bummer!

I have an appointment Monday to go over all my test results for everything I've had done for the last 6 weeks. It should be exciting!

In other non-IF news, I took yesterday off from work and it was soo nice! Our entire office is moving from one floor of our building to another. I have so much stuff, it was unstinkin' believable. The packing up is all done, the movers are moving as we speak, and unpacking starts Monday. I'm still mad I have to be in a cubicle instead of an office, but at least it's a WAY bigger cube. Stupid cubes!

I'm not doing so good with my diet. I keep going up and down, up and down and never actually getting anywhere. I need a lot more will power...does anyone have any to share? :)

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Ouchie Mama!!

I have been MIA - just nothing exciting going on in my life. BORING!

I had a HSG this morning and holy crap did it hurt. Today was the first day I have ever thought "man, I'm not going to be able to have a med-free labor." The speculum was first, then the catheter for the dye. When she put the catheter up there, I thought I was going to CRAWL OFF THE TABLE!!! I've never felt so much pressure in my life. It was like taking all the normal cramps I get during my period and putting them into 5 minutes. OUCHIE!!!!

The nurse tells me before she starts, some people say it doesn't hurt and some people say it's like menstrual cramps. BULL SH*T! I told her the people that say it doesn't hurt....THEY LIE!!! She laughed.

So the right tube is open, left tube isn't. DANG IT! I have a heart shaped uterus and apparently it is not retroverted (well today anyway).

My husband do they fix it? I said surgery I that right? I always have ovulation pain on the left side...NEVER the right. The one tube that's open doesn't ovulate (as far as I can tell). HOW WONDERFUL! (sarcasm)

Also, does anyone feel like their uterus and their bowels are linked. She put the catheter in and it felt like I was going to crap myself! HAHA! I'm just wondering if that's normal?

My husband is more than likely going to have to have knee surgery. He has a piece of bone floating around in his knee and a torn miniscus (they believe). Prayer Buddy - one more thing to add to the ever growing list :)

OH - the receptionist at the RE said to have a blood test done on CD21. They actually mean 7dpo, right?

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Decisions Decisions and Prayer Buddy

I’ve seen a few people post things they wanted their prayer buddy to pray specifically for. I’ve got one (or 100). I want to know what to do with myself. I’m 30 and at a self-proclaimed cross road. What do I want to do with the rest of my life? Here are the different routes…

1) The company I work for has almost 100% tuition reimbursement. Of course, you have to choose a major that will benefit them (it’s a chemical company). I’ve been a paralegal for years. I’ve been doing intellectual property (patents, trademarks, etc) for 8 years. I’ve been told I would make a great lawyer. That I need to go to school, get an undergrad in business (or chemistry) and then go to law school. It’s a great opportunity, but I don’t know that I WANT to do it. OH, and there’s a 5 year contract to sign.

2) I want to do something in the medical field. I know completely way off from what I’m doing now. I LOVE everything medical. The early part of last year, I was planning to start school in January 2010 (I have to start from the very beginning, I have NO college credits.) to become a nurse. Then came the affair and moving and the plans went out the window. The problem with it, how do I make this happen logistically. My husband can’t make enough money to support us. I know nursing is a full time college career.

3) Keep on keeping on. Stay where I am with what I'm doing...focus on making a baby and just figure out how to be happy with how life is.

What do I do?!?! Now I know myself pretty well. And I’m not content with a whole lot of things. I’m a “grass is greener” person. I always want what I can’t have and I get bored VERY easily. I’m not exactly happy with my job, but I get paid well. The company takes pretty good care of it’s employees (health insurance, bonuses, etc). I’m terrified if I leave this to pursue a nursing career, in a year I’ll hate it…then what?

If I stay here, take the lawyer route, who knows? Am I cut out for corporate America?

What to do, what to do? Any suggestions? So prayer buddy, this is my request….clarity. I would love a flashing sign from the heavens, but that ain’t going to happen, so I’ll take something, anything to let me know which way I should go. Is the easier road the best option? I would make a good attorney (I think) and with tuition reimbursement, who can complain…but is it what I WANT to do?!?

AHHHHHH Dear Lord Help Me. This is why I never went to college. Too many choices, the next one always better than the first. I could never make up my mind. The other quirk about me is…I tend to make decisions harder than they have to be.

I need to learn contentment too, I believe. Why can’t I just be happy with what I am and what I have?

And work a baby into either of the situations above. Because one or another…we’re having a baby!!! (I’ll need all the prayers I can get for this plan too!)

Oh, I also wanted to mention how exicted I am for prayer buddies..summer edition. I'm also super excited for the girl I get to pray for. Did I mention it's exciting?! There are always great things that follow!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Happy Birthday Bubba

Today is my husband's 41st birthday. He is such a party pooper. He HATES birthdays! So I gave him free reign. I told him to decide what he wanted to do, where to go to dinner everything!

He has this's call Ma.fia on He loves it. So instead of getting something great that he could use, or eat or do anything else with...he wants to spend money to play a computer game. Call me a girl...but STUPID! :)

Oh well...his birthday.

So in honor of The's a list (i've seen it on other blogs).

1. He is hilarious!!! A complete disaster. He can crack me up like none other and I love that.

2. He's a good daddy. Even though I dragged him 2200 miles away from his kids...I know that he loves them, and most of all, they know it too.

3. He takes care of me. After my ACL/MCL (knee) surgery, I was out of commission for weeks. He made me breakfast, made me take my pain pills (on time) and was just amazing! I hope if anything ever happens to him, I can take care of him the way he took care of me. I know I'll be completely spoiled when (if) I get pregnant. OOOHHH bring it on!!

4. He's a big baby. Not a whiner...just emotional. He can make me feel loved like no one else can. He cries at the movies (and lies about it later...of course!!) HAHA!

5. He's faithful. He loves God and his Church. Someone has to keep me in check :)

6. He HAS BABY FEVER!!!! Worse than I do I think. He wants a little girl soooo bad. He OOHS and AAHHS at all babies. It's soo cute.

7. He has road rage. HA!

8. He loves his family. He had a great-grandmother who he spent A LOT of time with as a little boy. The way he talks about her, oh he loved that woman. He talks about her with such reverence. I came up with 8. That's OK right?

I hope everyone has a wonderful 4th of July!!