Sunday, April 25, 2010

Random Thoughts

I've just barely started my blog and I'm already slacking...seriously. Three times in one week - OH so bad!

I'm a seriously bad Catholic. Very very bad Catholic. My husband and I visit my parents almost every weekend (because we're pathetic and have found no new friends in Jacksonville). Mass in the town my parents live is at 8:00am! I am no morning person (i'm going to blame it on hypothyroidism...HA!) and I just can't drag myself out of the bed to go. Let's be honest, it's just an excuse. I don't feel the pull I used to. Obviously, I feel guilty about it, or I wouldn't be blogging about it. Being raised Mormon, we were told when we pray to THANK God for the good things in your life, and not just to ask for things. I know it's a good idea to have, we do need to thank God, but I feel like I only go to Mass or Church to ask or BEG for things. Whether it's for me, or someone else, I only ASK for things. I try to through in the things I'm thankful for, but only because I feel like I have to, in order to get my prayers answered. Like God won't answer my prayers, unless I thank him first. God doesn't answer my prayers because it's not his will, not because I'm not kneeling right, or saying the right things, or holding my mouth right.

I hope that made sense, because I'm not re-reading it. Sorry!

I do love my husband, and am grateful for everything and everyone in my life. My husband is loving and understanding. Sometimes I wonder if marrying a man 10 years older than me was wise, and then I realize he keeps me a little bit more grounded than anyone else would. He's wise enough to help me put things in prospective and for that I am grateful. I get my panties in a wad about the craziest things. I am a control freak and freak out when I can't control situations. As you all know, infertility does not go well with control. DANG IT!

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In cycle news, I'm on CD12. No sign of good CF yet. Hopefully ovulation will be soon, and the egg(s) I ovulate will be worth a damn!

Question, my husband is going to have a sperm analysis done. He is not at all excited about it. He is very worried about getting his sample in a licit way. I've read we can buy a non-lubricated condom and poke holes in it? Is that correct? Any other ideas? We've never used condoms together and it was a very LONG time ago that we used them with anyone else. I can see this turning into a disaster. I need help!

6 comments:

  1. Ummmm... it COULD work with the "holy condom," but speaking from experience, it turned disastrous for us.

    I do have advice, you can email me at thiscrossiembrace at yahoo dot com and I'll give it to you :)

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  2. PPVI sent a kit for us to use when dh had his SA.

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  3. The "holy condom" caused a HUGE fight at our house -- it had nothing to do with the condom, but Mr. JB complained about having to use it and I lost it on him!

    I got mine from my Napro doc, so I'm sure that you can get it from yours as well.

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  4. Jacksonville, FL?

    I grew up in Fernandina Beach - my mom goes to Immaculate Conception in Jax.

    :)

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  5. Hi! I have been following IF blogs since February. I started one but never made it public. We've been trying to conceive for almost 8 years. Anyhow, I live in Jax! A friend of mine recently started an infertility support group in our diocese. We felt like it was SUCH a needed ministry! It's called Hannah's Heart. We are currently meeting once a month. I'd be happy to give you more info about it, if you'd like.

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  6. Hope in Him - I'm on the e-mail list for Hannah's Heart, I just haven't had a chance to make it to the meetings. Laura found me on the yahoo Catholic IF group and e-mailed me. I should go to the next one. It would be great to meet people in Jax.

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