Sunday, April 25, 2010

Random Thoughts

I've just barely started my blog and I'm already slacking...seriously. Three times in one week - OH so bad!

I'm a seriously bad Catholic. Very very bad Catholic. My husband and I visit my parents almost every weekend (because we're pathetic and have found no new friends in Jacksonville). Mass in the town my parents live is at 8:00am! I am no morning person (i'm going to blame it on hypothyroidism...HA!) and I just can't drag myself out of the bed to go. Let's be honest, it's just an excuse. I don't feel the pull I used to. Obviously, I feel guilty about it, or I wouldn't be blogging about it. Being raised Mormon, we were told when we pray to THANK God for the good things in your life, and not just to ask for things. I know it's a good idea to have, we do need to thank God, but I feel like I only go to Mass or Church to ask or BEG for things. Whether it's for me, or someone else, I only ASK for things. I try to through in the things I'm thankful for, but only because I feel like I have to, in order to get my prayers answered. Like God won't answer my prayers, unless I thank him first. God doesn't answer my prayers because it's not his will, not because I'm not kneeling right, or saying the right things, or holding my mouth right.

I hope that made sense, because I'm not re-reading it. Sorry!

I do love my husband, and am grateful for everything and everyone in my life. My husband is loving and understanding. Sometimes I wonder if marrying a man 10 years older than me was wise, and then I realize he keeps me a little bit more grounded than anyone else would. He's wise enough to help me put things in prospective and for that I am grateful. I get my panties in a wad about the craziest things. I am a control freak and freak out when I can't control situations. As you all know, infertility does not go well with control. DANG IT!


In cycle news, I'm on CD12. No sign of good CF yet. Hopefully ovulation will be soon, and the egg(s) I ovulate will be worth a damn!

Question, my husband is going to have a sperm analysis done. He is not at all excited about it. He is very worried about getting his sample in a licit way. I've read we can buy a non-lubricated condom and poke holes in it? Is that correct? Any other ideas? We've never used condoms together and it was a very LONG time ago that we used them with anyone else. I can see this turning into a disaster. I need help!


  1. Ummmm... it COULD work with the "holy condom," but speaking from experience, it turned disastrous for us.

    I do have advice, you can email me at thiscrossiembrace at yahoo dot com and I'll give it to you :)

  2. PPVI sent a kit for us to use when dh had his SA.

  3. The "holy condom" caused a HUGE fight at our house -- it had nothing to do with the condom, but Mr. JB complained about having to use it and I lost it on him!

    I got mine from my Napro doc, so I'm sure that you can get it from yours as well.

  4. Jacksonville, FL?

    I grew up in Fernandina Beach - my mom goes to Immaculate Conception in Jax.


  5. Hi! I have been following IF blogs since February. I started one but never made it public. We've been trying to conceive for almost 8 years. Anyhow, I live in Jax! A friend of mine recently started an infertility support group in our diocese. We felt like it was SUCH a needed ministry! It's called Hannah's Heart. We are currently meeting once a month. I'd be happy to give you more info about it, if you'd like.

  6. Hope in Him - I'm on the e-mail list for Hannah's Heart, I just haven't had a chance to make it to the meetings. Laura found me on the yahoo Catholic IF group and e-mailed me. I should go to the next one. It would be great to meet people in Jax.